It’s been a wild year so far.
And while the in-law drama remains (one sister in law isn’t even coming to the wedding, ugh), everything else seems to finally be piecing itself together.
Tag Archives: wedding
Camp NaNoWriMo April ’16
YALL.
Don’t ever plan a wedding. If you get engaged, go to the courthouse and get married, and then have a backyard barbecue or something.
The stress of wedding planning has finally made the inevitable happen. We’re postponing our wedding date. I can’t plan a wedding from afar. It’s just so stressful.
And it really just crept up on everyone. We had an 18-month engagement, and we all still somehow managed to put off everything until 4 months before the big day. If you do have a wedding, pro tip: DON’T DO THAT.
Through the midst of making this decision, I decided that I needed to creatively get all of the stress out. Pushing this back by 4-5 months is such a relief, but now I need to put it all down on paper.
HENCE – MY CAMP NANOWRIMO PROJECT
Here’s the description I wrote on my personal Facebook:
“My next writing project is a creative “non”fiction satire about how terribly I feel about wedding planning. It will be hilarious and sad and hilarious. No promises that I don’t drink wine while writing it too. I’ve drank so much lately.”
We’ve talked about using writing as therapy (and coffee too) and I’m finally going to use it as an outlet for all this craziness.
I don’t have a legit synopsis to share just yet, but I’m working on some planning-type things now so I’ll share that with the world once I’ve figured it out.
Gosh this is going to be a fun one to write.
Here’s a link to my camper profile. Are YOU taking part in Camp NaNoWriMo this year?
Wedding Planning is Hard
Pardon the non-writing related update, but dangit I had a bad day Wednesday and I want to write a post about it. Which is double unfortunate because I woke up in a great mood. I had every plan to have a wonderful day.
Wednesday, it suddenly hit me that our wedding was a mere 4 1/2 months away, and that we still didn’t know where the ceremony was going to take place. We’re getting married on a Saturday in June. It’s kind of imperative that we put a deposit on a church sometime soon.
Brad’s family is very religious. Southern Baptist, specifically. They don’t want alcohol at our wedding reception, but that is not happening.
The one big request I am trying to guarantee is that we get married in a church by a (male) pastor (their request).
But oh my goodness. It’s kind of difficult when you’re planning a wedding in Texas when you live in a Virginia. I have only spoken with one church, but (no particular surprise), their requirement is pre-marital counseling. IN. PERSON. Continue reading
Monday Musings #2
On Rejection:
After I got engaged last year, I bought some small trinkets and these boxes at Michael’s and made gifts to ask my bridal party to be in my wedding. They looked like this:
I made 6 total. For my 2 best friends, my 2 sisters, and my 2 future sister-in-laws.
I mailed all but the last two, because I live in the same town as my fiance’s family and I figured I would just give it to them in person.
But I kept leaving them on my kitchen table for months. Finally, we were going Christmas shopping with them yesterday and I remembered to bring them along, when my fiance let me know that they would probably say no.
“Why?” I asked him.
“Because my mom probably told them to say no.”
Well. Let me preface this by saying that it is well within anyone’s rights to say no. I get that a primary concern of being a bridesmaid is cost (though for the sake of his sisters, they won’t be in town soon enough to join our bachelorette party, and all I ask about their dress is that it’s navy blue. They can spend however little or much they want. So I don’t think cost is an issue here) or the responsibility (but my mom and sister and best friend back home are doing just about everything. We’re getting in married in Texas. I live in Virginia right now. There’s only so much we can do from afar).
Regardless of my opinion, though, they can say no.
More than anything, my feelings are hurt because of what my future mother in law said. I’ve never felt like they don’t like me necessarily, but I don’t feel very welcome either. Brad got lucky with my family. I guess someone had to get the short straw.
We’re probably moving to Texas next year, so this applies. (No kids though!)
I’ve never handled rejection well. Usually, if I think I’m going to be told no, I just don’t ask. It’s why I didn’t even try to join my family in Florida this summer. It’s why I didn’t use one extra vacation day to spend with my family for Thanksgiving.
Heck, while we’re reflecting on rejection, maybe it’s why I don’t do anything with my writing anymore. I think I’m afraid to let people read it. Because if it sucks, I would want them to tell me. And I can take criticism. That doesn’t mean it doesn’t sting just a little bit.
I got past it in college (because I mean I had to for creative writing seminars. We had a turn in every week), but it was always short stories. Bigger works that take months to finish, they’re my babies! I don’t want to be told they’re not good enough!
Fear of rejection is one thing I never really grew out of. I’m working on it. I know though that it’s the best way to grow. To face rejection of all sorts, be it not getting spoiled with every toy you ever wanted, or being told that your writing isn’t good enough. I do believe that it shapes you as an adult, or as a writer.
Doesn’t mean I like it though.
I did not ask Brad’s sisters last night. I kept the boxes in the truck. We’re going back over next Sunday (and Christmas) so I will reevaluate my opinion and decide before then if I even want to ask. I just don’t want them to say no just because my future MIL said no. They’re both old enough to make their own decisions (at 16 and 19, I would hope so anyway).
I’m a work in progress myself. I’ll figure it out eventually.
The Caffeinated Writer 